Thursday, 9 April 2009

Because I want to be the best me....

Something has happened over the last couple of days.

Something has changed and I think it's going to be really good for me. For my mental health as well as my physical health.

I have realised that I am too heavy... okay, well, I knew that. However I have always looked at my weight as a number on the scale and as a gauge of whether I am OK or NOT OK.. That sounds harsh, but it is true. It was all wrapped up in body image, feelings of self worth and whether I felt ugly or pretty. Don't get me wrong. I don't think being overweight is ugly. Deep down I know I'm beautiful, but these things just come into your head sometimes.

ANYWAY! So I am feeling pretty good about my life right now. I am not feeling any sense that I am not worthy, not gorgeous or not OK. But I am too heavy...

I am too heavy to be the best runner and athlete that I can be

Woh! I never ever thought I would consider myself an athlete! But I am heading that way and I do not want to let a few kilos weigh me down. I have been thinking about how much happier my body and knees would have been on Sunday if I hadn't run 14kms with 10-15 extra kilos on my body. I crave feeling light and bouncy!! (Not that type of bouncy!)

So... what do I need to do to get light?!!

I know exactly what I need to do...

eat CLEAN! eat ENOUGH! eat RIGHT! And train SENSIBLY!

I will be putting my food diary on here more regularly and giving more in-depth analysis on here as to how it's all going for me.

There is no magic number on the scale. I know I carry a lot of muscle so I will never be as light as those chicks who don't weight train, however somewhere from 70-75kgs works right for me... Or about a size 12. I am going to enjoy a sensible amount of chocolate over easter (a medium sized fair trade egg) but after that the treats are out for a while. Not going to set a time limit. I just need to get back in the habit of eating real foods all the time!!

So Stay tuned!

Food today:
B. 2 slices wholemeal toast with 2 eggs and a soy latte.
1/2 litre water
S. 3 tbs natural fat free yoghurt with whey protein and 1 tsp honey. 1/2 slice capeseed loaf
L. Grilled fish with salad, 1 slice capeseed loaf.
2 litres of water
S. Small smoothie w/ soy, banana, whey protein
D. Grilled mustard chicken w/ mashed sweet potato, piles of broccoli and green beans

8 of you love me enough to comment...:

AlleyCat said...

Hey Ash! Well done on the fun run. excellent post. Accurate & truthful :0)
Enjoy you Chocolate!

AlleyCat said...

**your!

Kate said...

great post ash... get back to basics huh?
Have a lovely easter :)

Little Fat Duck said...

Sounds brilliant Ash! Having a reason other than the scale to lose the weight will make it alot more enjoyable, because every step you take you are working towards something that you are passionate about :o) So proud of you

skinny latte said...

I like the sound of your menu - yum yum!!

I had the same mental shift when I was training for the tris - and also now that I'm training for the half - it's about eating well for performance and feeling good, not just for weight loss. If you focus on the first two, the third will come on its own, I've found.

I'm so proud of you Ash.

Happy Easter :)

xxxx

Miss Milo said...

What a great change in your thinking Ash! You're an inspiration lady :)

Happy easter!
xxx

Olivia said...

That menu sounds delicious!

ani pesto said...

That is such a fantastic and inspirational shift in thinking. I hope I can get there one day too.